History creates quite an interesting narrative for WCW. Sure, it’s largely the narrative that WWE promotes nowadays and it’s part of the reason why I started this project in the first-place way back when. Beyond that, most people just chalk WCW’s eventual demise to a myriad of things, but the old, rich talent at the top keeping their spots and stinking the joint up while the younger talent is on fire at the start of the show is one of the most prevalent.
I’ve already begun to notice that trend and I figured it wouldn’t really become noticeable until later in this year or even 1998 as the WWF starts to catch up. That point aside, I have to honestly say something as I’m in the midst of it: I fucking get it right now. Common audiences aren’t going to tune in or buy if superstars they recognize aren’t on the show or featured prominently. However, while they are there, I’m sure they will like some of that fresh talent and like to follow their journeys as well.
SuperBrawl VII is one of the most interesting cases of that I’ve discovered thus far. There are great matches on this show that are treated poorly, there are bad matches on this show that people are happy about and there’s a lot to take away. In the status quo, however, there is really not much to complain about. If this is the output in this stage of the game, we are far ahead. It sucks we will fall way beyond in a short period of time, but I’m enjoying the ride for now.
PAY PER VIEW NUMBER 125: WCW SUPERBRAWL VII
Written on 8/30/22
HOW WE START: We are in fucking Alcatraz. Roddy Piper is in a cell and gets out with dramatic lighting and breathing. This is WrestleCrap city. An officer stops him, but he knows his way. He runs out screaming. He’s got dust/white shit on his face. He’s spent seven days locked up and says Hogan is an extinction. He laughs and yells at San Francisco on a boat. Then, he yells at sharks and claims “I’m coming!” This is pure, LVP battiness. We got live in the Cow Palace and the crowd is just as loud as the pyro. Dusty Rhodes, Bobby Heenan and Tony Schiavone welcome us. Piper’s title opportunity and his craziness is the focus. They quickly pivot to discussing the opening match.
MATCH NUMBER ONE: CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE MATCH- Syxx vs Dean Malenko (Champ)
BEFORE THE BELL: Syxx stealing titles is recapping. He took Dean’s on the Nitro after Souled Out and tried to steal the US Title for a second time, but Eddie Guerrero thwarts him. The B-Team music just doesn’t fit Syxx. Schiavone puts the building over huge and it really looks and feels important with the unique entrance set up. Malenko gets a huge pop and looks a little cut, too. Tony becomes the first MVP with his details and mentioned Dean’s dad trained Syxx.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-The champ destroys Syxx with an early clothesline and suplex, but keeps pulling him up on pin attempts. Hot start. More pummeling along with the anger/stupidity of not winning adds depth to his character.
-Dueling chants of “123” and “sucks” before Malenko becomes another MVP via his explosiveness. A cross body sends both men over the top. The title is ominously left in the corner after the Iceman postures with it. The momentum turns with a nice counter kick by the former Kid.
-Multiple sleeper holds slow things down, but Malenko keeps his offense high impact like a belly-to-back suplex to get out.
-Dean’s neck is focused on and Heenan is good talking about his history of issues. Syxx hits a nice top rope leg drop for two. I’m digging this crowd. They feel modern, but they are doing their job.
-Dusty doesn’t know what Amtrak is as Malenko hits a big second rope throw/Syxx counters in an odd spot. The heel grabs the belt and Eddie Guerrero runs out to stop him. There’s a convoluted tug-o-war between the three. Eddie lets go and the title goes into the champ’s face HARD.
HOW DOES IT END:
Syxx wins the title in 12:02 with a title shot to the face
FINAL WORD: What else can you ask for in an opener?
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Guerrero is very upset at the results and his hand in it. After the replay, Mean Gene pimps the hotline in the locker room and talks to DDP. His New World Order opponent tonight is unknown, but he doesn’t buy it. He calls the boss “Eric Bisquick” and Gene gets word during the interview while figuring it out at the same time that Buff Bagwell is the man. I like Page’s cool, laid-back demeanor here. It’s a good look for him,
MATCH NUMBER TWO: Konnan, La Parka and Villano IV vs Super Calo, Ciclope and Juventud Guerrera
BEFORE THE BELL: Konnan’s team walk out to some weird hip-hop music I don’t recognize, but like. Mike Tenay joins commentary thankfully. Just from the presentation of the entrances, this is better than the AAA match at the 1997 Royal Rumble. The babyface team enters while the entire announce booth do a good job putting over the Latin community in San Francisco.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-Villano and Ciclope start while Bobby gets mildly emotional honoring Ray Stevens per Tenay’s reference to him in the Cow Palace. This feeling out process turns into Juvi vs K-Dawg speeding up and Juvi getting destroyed with a clothesline. He answers back with a nice springboard dropkick.
-Konnan kills all three including a stiff powerbomb on Ciclope. Parka hits a spin kick on Calo in the tree of woe. It’s impossible to keep up here. I can’t believe Guerrera is only 21! Calo hits a slingshot senton on the floor, but has an ugly miss on the mat leading to a La Parka dive with his opponent sitting in a chair.
-Villano is definitely the worst of the six and becomes an uncoordinated LVP. Ciclope lands roughly on a springboard dive. Yikes. Let’s look at Harlem Heat backstage on AOL instead! Juvi mostly misses a 450 splash on Villano and it’s just a transitional spot.
-Juventud and Parka have an awesome sequence ending with a springboard spin kick as Parka is sitting on the top rope. Then, Juvi takes a Doomsday Device and double spinebuster. All six men wind up in a convoluted rolling cradle pin sequence.
-Konnan CHUCKS Juventud over the top and the heels lock the other faces in a “star”/rowboat. Parka applies a surfboard in the middle of it to a great pop. The faces respond with a triple suicide dive. I’m exhausted in the best way.
-Back in the ring, Konnan hits his finisher out of nowhere. There’s confusion on Juventud obviously kicking out, but the ref calling for the bell. It is ultimately over.
HOW DOES IT END:
Konnan, La Parka and Villano IV win in 9:53 when Konnan pins Juventud Guerrera with the Power Drop
FINAL WORD: That was perfect lucha libre: fast, awesome, messy and wild. Okay, maybe it was a little TOO messy.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: The commentators talk through the confusing ending, but Bobby handles the highlights well. The audience is shown and I notice the famous Bowl Cut Kid. Time for another luchadore.
MATCH NUMBER THREE: TV TITLE MATCH- Rey Mysterio Jr vs Prince Iaukea (Champ)
BEFORE THE BELL: I love Rey’s green, red and yellow gear. He’s challenging the shocking new champ: perennial jobber Prince Iaukea. Trying to capitalize on Rocky Maivia much? The crowd is not a fan of him. He looks like Mila Kunis’ boyfriend in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but not as fit. Mila could take him out Flavor of Love style (and there’s our reference challenge for today). Tenay sticks around.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-Hand shaking and chain wrestling to start. Prince is a little sloppy, but Rey keeps him mostly straight up to a shaky legged cross body from the top to the floor.
-The crowd is distracted by something while Iaukea is on offense. I don’t blame them. Rey catches him mid-air off the top with a dropkick. Dusty and Tenay have a good, fun rapport AKA Mike puts up with the Dream well enough.
-Mysterio does a suicide dive senton and it looks like it sucked for both guys.
-Rey hits a double jump moonsault and the new champ kicks out at one. Stupid LVP level psychology. He does hit an impressive second rope Samoan Drop.
-Lord Steven Regal enters while Rey hits a messy hurricanrana. Regal gets involved and Prince unknowingly takes advantage.
HOW DOES IT END:
Prince Iaukea retains in 8:56 after Lord Steven Regal pulls Rey Mysterio face first on the ring apron
FINAL WORD: It’s impossible for Rey to have a match any worse than fine. That said, this was pushing fine.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Iaukea gives Rey the belt? Rey refuses and gives it back. Heenan says he’ll take it because it’s got to be worth something. Regal taunts both on his knees in the aisle. Mean Gene promotes the hotline again and interviews The Giant. It’s all about staying composed and in control against the Outsiders for the titles in a handicap match later. It’s another different mood in a promo, but it works better than his previous efforts.
MATCH NUMBER FOUR: Buff Bagwell vs Diamond Dallas Page
BEFORE THE BELL: Buff has the nWo B-Team music and modified his American Males tights for his new group. The commentators talk about Lex Luger’s storyline injury and being forced out of the tag match. DDP enters to a great response even with the dubbed theme. His pyro helps, too. He gets big chants at the bell. Even his new shirt is dope.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-BIG slap to Buff and it’s all Dallas early. He hits a cool DDT/neckbreaker. He’s an equally meteoric perpetual MVP like Stone Cold. Dusty has a total breakdown trying to say “chronologically” and I’m in tears.
-Buff hits a cool modified cutter of tornado fashion out of the corner. He’s also getting better with heeling in the camera. He pushes the ref and gets pushed back and shouted out. The crowd loves it and it’s much better than every time Earl Hebner does it. Good for you, Scott Dickinson!
-Page gets a second wind and hits a big powerbomb for two. There’s some back-and-forth cheating roll ups, but it’s still nearfalls. Buff hits his old Fisherman’s suplex, but doesn’t want the pin. He wants DDP counted out to 10. As Dallas gets up, Buff tries a neckbreaker and BANG! Diamond Cutter and the crowd absolutely explodes. The nWo runs out and Page escapes in the crowd. The bell rings and the official word is finally announced.
HOW DOES IT END:
Diamond Dallas Page wins in 9:46 by DQ
FINAL WORD: These two have such great chemistry with one another and always have a nice match with one another.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Page celebrates with his people in the crowd and strengthens his MVP foothold. A PlayStation contest winner is shown in the front row.
MATCH NUMBER FIVE: US TITLE MATCH- Chris Jericho vs Eddie Guerrero (Champ)
BEFORE THE BELL: Basketball Highlights #2 means Jericho is still rocking big “come on, baby” energy. This is his first US Title chance. Both Jericho and Guerrero get muted pops.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-They start with grinding mat work. Random spurts of speed or high impact moves land, but the crowd is quiet/tired from the last match. It also doesn’t help that it’s face versus face again like the TV title.
-Test of strength with bridging, dueling backslides and stalling suplexes all receive nothing. I think the bar listening to the Dracula musical for the first time was more receptive (one more reference to go).
-Jericho applies a transitional Lion Tamer. That was something from him I wasn’t expecting. The crowd gets very restless as this is treated like a rest hold. There are catcalls and “boring” shouts all at once. Chris applies a bow and arrow torture rack afterwards.
-The challenger kicking out of a powerbomb gets booed. After a brainbuster, the Frog Splash follow up misses. Jericho sends Eddie flying with a sweet release German suplex. Bobby keeps calling the champ “La Bamba.”
-An awesome sequence ends with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex for another good false finish. This crowd is tough to crack. I guess they just want storytelling. Both men try dropkicks and spin kicks twice for a rare double double down.
-Plenty of cool roll ups, cradles and reversals for two. Eddie barely gets his leg under the rope on a Northern Lights into a pin. One more sequence and the champ finally keeps the scrappy newcomer down.
HOW DOES IT END:
Eddie Guerrero retains in 12:03 with a sunset flip pin
FINAL WORD: That match deserves a better crowd. There was nothing wrong with it and was actually very good.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Respect is shown afterwards, but the crowd doesn’t care. I bet they care for the fucking Dungeon of Doom, though.
MATCH NUMBER SIX: TRIANGLE MATCH- Faces of Fear vs Public Enemy vs Harlem Heat w/Sister Sherri
BEFORE THE BELL: This was originally a four corners match to determine the #1 contenders for the tag titles, but the Steiners getting into an nWo induced car accident prevented that. Tony says it will never be shown again and I won’t put the video here. Faces of Fear are out first, then Public Enemy with their obnoxious dubbed theme and a table. Harlem Heat are out last and mad about the fact there’s no title shot on the line. I love their white gear look. Sherri’s looks are questioned for the 9,000th time. Rocco Rock is now bald and it’s pointed out.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-Barbarian and Rocco start, but Stevie Ray enters soon after. Rock is just getting his ass kicked. Grunge is more of the same except he sells kicks ridiculously (it’s like he bounces himself on the mat).
-Public Enemy is still getting owned by Harlem Heat. It takes a Barbarian cheap shot to help. Meng enters as a house of fire and even throws a dropkick. Booker T is clobbered in the corner and Barbarian continues to impress with a top rope belly-to-belly.
-Heenan crosses a line and claims the Faces of Fear live in trees as savages. Both Dusty and Tony vehemently shut him down.
-Things break down and Barbarian impressively catches Rocco in mid-air with a powerbomb/Styles Clash clutch. With the referee distracted, Grunge helps out to win in an upset.
HOW DOES IT END:
Public Enemy win in 7:44 when Rocco Rock pins Barbarian after a top rope cross body by Johnny Grunge
FINAL WORD: WCW triangle matches are always bunk, but this was the least offensive thus far.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Dusty gets totally distracted by a buxom woman in the crowd, but Heenan handles the replay professionally as always. We aren’t wasting any more time here.
MATCH NUMBER SEVEN: GRUDGE MATCH WITH A SPOT IN THE HORSEMEN ON THE LINE-Steve McMichael w/Debra McMichael vs Jeff Jarrett
BEFORE THE BELL: The spot on the line is just for Jarrett to get in if he wins; it’s not believed that there are any consequences for McMichael losing. I hate this era of Jarrett so much. Debra’s heart is also purported to be on the line. The pre-match strut gets big boos and Mongo is the de facto face.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-Jarrett outwrestles early and gets cocky. He’s stopped with a powerslam and chop blocks.
-Mongo is VERY loud selling an abdominal stretch and Debra is VERY loud with her facial expressions. She hits Jeff’s hand with the briefcase as he tries to cheat. Yet, she gives him a towel to wipe off. Her husband uses the towel to choke him.
-Jarrett does Bryan Danielson’s “I got till five” schtick. Speaking of five, it thankfully took that many minutes for Mongo to mess up a clothesline (he stumbles and takes a front bump instead).
-Debra is once again an LVP threat with her comments in the camera and her actions make the commentators explode. McMichael hits a nice sidewalk and salto slam. The ref gets blinded by Jarrett’s hand on a kickout. Mongo asks for the Haliburton, but Debra tosses it over her head into the other man’s hands for an UNPROTECTED loud thud of a blow.
HOW DOES IT END:
Jeff Jarrett wins in 8:12 with a Haliburton shot to the head
FINAL WORD: This is another match that was nowhere near as bad as I was thinking it would be.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Debra winks while explaining herself and she remains the worst actress. The replay shows what a good catch Jarrett made.
MATCH NUMBER NINE: SAN FRANCISCO DEATH MATCH- Kevin Sullivan w/Jimmy Hart and Jacquelyn vs Chris Benoit w/Woman
BEFORE THE BELL: Oh hey, more Dungeon music! I’m happy this time because it’s a sequel to an excellent match. Sullivan is not billed as the Taskmaster anymore and he’s got Jackie in her PPV debut. The ladies will be strapped together and that doesn’t make Woman back down at all. There’s a tug-o-war and massive brawl at the bell and the crowd pops huge.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-The ladies fight on the floor and the men equal their intensity in the ring. The commentators have too many laughs over this blood feud. The women use the strap on the guys in the ring including Sullivan getting crotched with it.
-Okay, I really didn’t need to see Benoit hung over the top rope with the strap. I guess that’s how you can tell this go around? He’s blatantly kicked low by Jackie in “the thing” as Dusty calls it. The girls keep beating the shit out of the men and clothesline both guys with the strap. Rhodes is having a heart attack.
-The men make their way up the aisle to brawl and go into the audience. A split screen still shows the ladies in the ring, but the ref is with them instead of the actual match participants. Truck slams and garbage can throws take place backstage. This is so wild. They make their way back to ringside.
-Sullivan hits the tree of woe and stomp, but Woman saves her guy. The Crippler hits a piledriver and puts Sullivan on a table. Jacquelyn lays on top of him to protect, but Benoit doesn’t give a fuck and splashes both of them without the table breaking. The crowd goes apeshit. Mark Curtis is amazing at shaking his head and hesitating to count.
HOW DOES IT END:
Chris Benoit wins in 8:35 after a top rope splash onto a table
FINAL WORD: In the best way, that was total insanity. Plus, we got a bonus match within a match that equaled the passion and anger.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Everyone but Jimmy and Woman are out cold. They ask for help and Arn Anderson is shown watching shocked. Paul Orndorff, Terry Taylor and Lee Marshall come down. What the fuck are they going to do? How about paramedics? Jimmy and Woman hold hands and convalescent together in a great touch. Three stretchers and boards are brought out to take everyone out. This is an all-around great angle. Jackie hasn’t moved once. They are finally loaded into an ambulance. Tony pivots into an Uncensored commercial with Hugh Morrus in jail laughing about everything.
MATCH NUMBER NINE: TAG TITLE HANDICAP MATCH- The Giant vs The Outsiders (Champs)
BEFORE THE BELL: Real nWo music finally! The crowd stays hot for the champs alongside Syxx. Dusty misreads their “Aztecas” shirt as Alcatraz and Bobby calls him illiterate. The theme has a weird “you’re going down” with Scott Hall’s voice. The lights go out and Giant still has green lights for his entrance, but no music. There’s big pyro and the crowd is very supportive. The Outsiders goof off during the Giant’s taunt.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-Hall does the toothpick throw, slaps Giant and does a Frankenstein taunt to mock. He mistimes a pie face and looks silly. The crowd chants “Giant” and Nash tags in and takes his time. The big boys batter each other and Giant dropkicks him over the top and slams him into the post. He’s pushing MVP limits.
-Syxx comes off the top with his title belt to turn the tide. Scott is off again with a messy second rope bulldog that looked very harsh. Big “Luger” chants as Giant takes the heat. Syxx whiffs on a spin kick and the double team drags on.
-Giant fires up and catches Syxx in mid-air and chucks him into Nash. Hall hits Giant with the title from behind. Then, KEVIN NASH EFFORTLESSLY JACKKNIFES GIANT! Why isn’t this mentioned or shown as often as their botch the next year? Holy shit!
-Lex Luger runs out and Bischoff tries to stop him, but gets thrown down. The audience is apoplectic as Lex tags in and uses his cast on all three guys. He gets Nash up and the bell rings. After that bell, Giant chokeslams Hall and he’s counted down as well just in case.
HOW DOES IT END:
The Giant and Lex Luger win the titles in 8:53 after Lex Luger makes Kevin Nash submit in the Torture Rack
FINAL WORD: What a pro wrestling segment. Despite some questionable booking logic (especially going forward), this was just too much fun.
THE STUFF IN-BETWEEN: Tony claims the pin was insurance so Bischoff couldn’t strip them. Okay, sure. It happens anyway. There’s an extensive replay and the commentators are totally exhausted. They do give Nash credit for his strength.
MATCH NUMBER TEN: WCW TITLE MATCH- Roddy Piper vs Hollywood Hulk Hogan w/Vincent and Ted DiBiase (Champ)
BEFORE THE BELL: There’s no Michael Buffer surprisingly. There’s a weird noise before the nWo music and Hogan’s entrance with his cronies. Hulk takes a shitty flag from a fan that reads “NWO 4 LIFE.” Piper enters all dirty and disheveled. The commentators talk about his whole mindset and scenario like crazy. His kilt is grabbed and spat on.
WHAT STANDS OUT
-The bell rings and Hogan bails right away. He tries to leave, but Roddy grabs him and brings him back. He digs at the eyes and blatantly low blows him in front of the ref. Of course, no DQ is called.
-Biting, choking, crawling, bailing: the name of the game. The crowd is into it even if I’m not. I will still count the rinky dink UNPROTECTED chair shot to Hogan. Piper no sells a low blow and gouges at the champ’s nose.
-Michael Wallstreeet runs down and gets hit as does Vincent. He pokes Hogan’s eyes after punches. I’m so over this Three Stooges shit. Sting and Randy Savage walk down the aisle and Savage goes to ringside despite Sting trying to quietly stop him.
-The Rowdy One hits the worst “spear” I’ve ever seen. The crowd chants “we want Sting” and he leaves out the entrance. Just wrong.
-Hogan’s offense is merely punching, biting and slapping. It’s uglier than Jason Segel naked (and our reference challenge is done).
-Piper survives a LONG bearhug and low blows Hollywood again. The sleeper is applied and Hogan starts going out while Savage watches. The arm goes down three times, the bell fucking rings and the crowd loses it when Piper starts celebrating. WAY after the bell, Savage pulls Hulk’s leg under the bottom rope and hands him a foreign object.
-The ref pulls Piper’s hand down and he walks into a cheap shot. No announcements are being made, the bell rings AGAIN and I have no idea what’s going on.
HOW DOES IT END:
Hollywood Hulk Hogan retains in 10:59 with a foreign object punch
FINAL WORD: WCW: where the main event almost completely ruins the entire show in 11 minutes.
BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE: The crowd incessantly boos when Hogan is announced is the winner. Macho Man helps him up and they beat Piper up together. What sense does this make? Savage spray paints a convulsing Piper while the announcers question Sting’s role in it all. Two top rope elbows look fucking lethal on Piper and Hogan adds two leg drops. There’s no help for this man??? The New World Order theme plays and Tony explains the ref’s decision finally while “the brotherhood” talks into the camera. Piper sells really well and gets hit with another elbow and pinned by Randy. Hogan’s high pitched “sweeeeeet” is lame and cool at the same time. DiBiase’s indoor sunglasses are just lame. The Outsiders are constantly namedropped by their teammates. Tony summarizes the events and signs off as Hulk says into the camera “who is gonna stop us now?”
THE LAST IMAGE: Hollywood Hulk Hogan
THE WRAP UP
FINAL MVP of PPV: The Giant and Dean Malenko were extremely over, but had significant help with their dance partners. Meanwhile, DDP continues to ascend with less help and stand out no matter what. He is a true breakout star.
FINAL LVP of PPV: Roddy Piper’s antics were saved by his situation at the very end of the show, but I cannot overstate how out of place Debra McMichael feels every time she appears. She’s a bad actress and adds nothing. Nepotism, everyone!
MY FAVORITE MATCH: Chris Benoit vs Kevin Sullivan
MY LEAST FAVORITE MATCH: Hollywood Hulk Hogan vs Roddy Piper
FINAL WORD: This was a tremendous show. The matches weren’t long, but the show felt right in its energy and freneticism. The crowd and building felt very special. This may be WCW’s apex at the moment: fresh, exciting and loud. Starrcade gets the historical attention, but SuperBrawl is the true banner show for the brand. MULLET RECOMMENDS
NEXT TIME: Let’s keep the WCW train rolling with (checks notes) shit…Uncensored. Third time is a charm?