Here are a few things to keep in mind before we get into today’s diary:
1. We have another gimmick Starrcade. It’s been a couple years since the Lethal Lotteries and the Iron Man Challenge and the Pat O’Connor tournament. It’s odd that Eric Bischoff would go to a well that didn’t work and basically led to his hiring, but he must feel confident and good about what he has.
2. This is the final PPV of 1995. If you listen to any of my podcasts, you know it’s something everyone I’ve been speaking to has been anticipating. Could that honestly be a factor into my thoughts on the show overall? Sometimes, you are just relieved to be done with something and you have a positive outlook because of that.
3. We hit a major milestone next week.
4. It’s 1995 and there’s a show with a predominantly foreign roster competing on it. I’m not enthused about how this is going to sound and play out in terms of racism and tact.
5. I’m watching this before Royal Rumble weekend 2022, so I’m amped up at this point
Enough lists! I’m not Letterman! Let’s go!
PAY PER VIEW NUMBER 99-WCW STARRCADE 1995
Written on 1/27/22
THE FIRST THING YOU SEE: The World Cup of Wrestling being set up to the voice of…Chris Cruise?!?! Each match is highlighted while discussing the global ramifications. We go live in Nashville and I’m already afraid of how the crowd will respond to most of these wrestlers. Tony Schiavone welcomes us alongside Bobby Heenan and THE AMERICAN DWEAM in a cowboy hat. He focusing on the Japanese “evading” before messing up the word immeasurable. They finally bring up the triangle match for the WCW Title shot in the main event. Bobby predicts Ric Flair becoming champion after being called a weasel.
-Let’s open up things hot with Chris Benoit to a mixed reaction! He looks cocky and confident. I should probably get used to this theme as Jushin Thunder Liger enters with Sonny Onoo. Why does Liger have a mini-Japanese flag like he’s a Rougeau. Dusty is an LVP already by calling him “Sonny Bono” as Bobby jumps all over him. Benoit is cheered by swatting the flag away. Schiavone says Heenan sold himself to the Japanese as he lists the stuff that’s been given by them.
MATCH NUMBER ONE: WORLD CUP OF WRESTLING MATCH- Chris Benoit vs Jushin Thunder Liger w/Sonny Onoo
-It’s fast paced early with Liger hitting a baseball slide and senton from the apron. Dusty talks fast about the best pound for pound in the world.
-It’s going to be a long night if Bobby talks about rickshaws all night. It’s been all Liger with his patented rolling kicks and a hurricanrana. It’s answered back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. A nice handspring block of a dive and some charisma under the hood makes Jushin our first MVP. Dusty calls it “tipsy toe.”
-I absolutely LOVE the sound that the WCW ring makes off of Benoit’s attacks. He slaps on a Liontamer and his intensity and tone to the ref of “ask him” makes me you can see what’s coming once again.
-A surfboard is called a “bow and arrow” as well as an “uncling situation” by Dusty. I can’t tell if I love it or hate it. More submissions by Liger and Dusty is now talking about “rick-a-shaws.”
-Great strength on a tombstone counter by Liger, but he wastes time and ends up taking a superplex to a big pop.
-BIG miss on the swan dive headbutt. A Liger Bomb and brainbuster each get a two count.
-Benoit hits two Germans together as opposed to three and a mighty powerbomb. The Taskmaster comes down as Benoit hits the headbutt. The Dungeon and Horsemen problems are addressed. The distraction leads to a sloppy finish.
WINNER: Jushin Thunder Liger in 10:29 to put NJPW up 1-0 with a hurricanrana pin
-Brian Pillman’s issues with the Dungeon are blamed for the distraction during the replay.
FINAL WORD: The finish may have stunk, but I’m always going to think that Benoit vs Liger totally rules.
-Mean Gene interviews Eddie Guerrero backstage. He’s upset about the interference in the last match. He’s a VERY unconfident promo. Gene smiles at him trying. It’s sadly an LVP effort, but I know his match will make up for it. Gene is underrated in saving these moments from being total disasters with his professionalism and quick thinking.
-The New Japan guys thankfully have different themes. Koji Kanemoto enters as the current Junior Heavyweight Champ. His song is a jam. Tony claims that he has the biggest temper and he’s proven right by yelling at fans in the aisle. His opponent is Alex Wright, all smiles and slapping hands. He’s happy that everyone likes him in this case. Boy, he’s had an up and down year.
MATCH NUMBER TWO: WORLD CUP OF WRESTLING MATCH- Koji Kanemoto w/Sonny Onoo vs Alex Wright
-Schiavone mentions Hulk Hogan’s suspension ending soon. A “USA” starts towards a German kid. My grandpa is probably rolling in his grave. Why is Jim Duggan not on this show?
-Impressive speed and crispness from some chain wrestling and leg work by Koji.
-Wright hits some bad uppercuts, but his arm drags are better. Bobby claims the New Japan guys have been training in the Smoky Mountains for weeks.
-Wright hits a dive to the floor. He just lacks a certain “oomph.” Koji doesn’t and yells in the face of a fan while getting up.
-Rhodes is constantly questioned about what he just said. It’s the most exciting thing in this match so far. He just said “soliloquy” and “filibuster.”
-A brawl develops on the floor after a whip into the rail. Heenan has a great line about Das Wunderkind needing to be restrained over his haircut.
-Kanemoto hits a grazing moonsault, but doesn’t go for the pin. A double dropkick in mid-air causes a double down.
-After a twisting senton for a two count, they rerun the double dropkick spot, but Alex lands it flush. He does the same with a follow up missile dropkick.
-The face gets caught with snake eyes, then gets abruptly beaten.
WINNER: Koji Kanemoto in 11:43 to put NJPW up 2-0 with a folding press
-Onoo speaks into the camera before the replay shows Koji dominating. Heenan naturally says “sayonara.”
FINAL WORD: That lacked some energy from the crowd and the cohesion of the first match, but it was still a good match.
-The commentators analyze before Okerlund pimps the hotline and mentions Mark Madden. Onoo comes in laughing and says he’ll buy WCW and Iowa. “Everything is for sale in America.” Man, Eric Bischoff’s karate shit got this LVP candidate a job. Gene almost calls him something offensive while calling Schiavone “Eric.” Bobby says the Japanese own everything anyway and Dusty takes offense over Texas being owned.
-Sonny is going to wear out some pairs of shoes tonight walking his men to the ring. This time, it’s Masahiro Chono. Now, he’s a Mafia guy. I still don’t like him. Lex Luger is his opponent and gets a huge pop despite being accompanied by Jimmy Hart. All of his friends and enemies across the company are mentioned. I have low expectations for this.
MATCH NUMBER THREE: WORLD CUP OF WRESTLING MATCH- Masahiro Chono w/Sonny Onoo vs Lex Luger w/Jimmy Hart
-A bad headlock and rough press slam means Lex lands on the LVP list already. Never mind his usual noises.
-A big boot causes Luger to bail and waste a ton of time by jawing at his opponent.
-A weird whip/head drive into the corner turnbuckle turns the tide. Chono chokes, scratches and claws to keep the advantage.
-STF applied by Chono. Fuck it, I love John Cena’s more. Luger gets to the ropes. Masa hits the Mafia kick and Dusty immediately makes fun of the call. Poor Tony does research and gets raked over the coals for it. Bobby joins in and it’s sadly very funny. They call the “Sicilian elbow” and “Yugoslavian neckbreaker.” Oh yeah, one block happens and it’s all over.
WINNER: Lex Luger in 6:41 to make the score NJPW 2-1 with the torture rack
-This win gets a HUGE ovation. Sweet and sour sauce, soy sauce and sake are all mentioned in the replay by Brain. Gross.
FINAL WORD: Speaking of gross, there’s my match analysis.
-Gene interviews the WCW captain, Sting. He’s still upset about losing the U.S. Title to Kensuke Sasaki. He’s fired up in a very natural and funny way about the Luger situation. This is a great Sting. I’d say it’s an MVP promo even when he says that he wants Macho Man so bad that he can taste him.
-Johnny B Badd is next with Kimberly. She does flips now and the commentators ogle her. She’s very jumpy and dresses like Badd now. She’s got more energy than Charlie Day dropping cocaine (and I guess I’m doing a Horrible Bosses reference challenge). Two Badd Blasters are shot off. A contemplative theme plays for mean Masa Saito. Dusty puts him over well and Bobby does the same as his AWA manager. He looks non-plussed to be there. Sonny gets on the mic and says Kim should be home doing the dishes. She calls him HOP SING from Bonanza and claims to not be a Geisha girl in a bath house. FUCKING YIKES. Dusty likes her being more “volitable” now.
MATCH NUMBER FOUR: WORLD CUP OF WRESTLING MATCH- Johnny B Badd w/Kimberly vs Masa Saito w/Sonny Onoo
-Nice Zubaz-like tights for Saito. He’s built like a brick shithouse. Badd looks scared.
-Saito and Badd slap the shit out of each other back and forth. Hell yeah! It’s been rough looking besides that, but that sequence is enough for me.
-The first instance of Onoo cheating occurs when he chokes Badd with the Japanese flag. Heenan accidentally calls the Pitbull “Pillman” instead of Pittman when his quest for a manager comes up. More cheating and big moves by Saito. Tony is teased again for a simple Russian leg sweep call.
-Nice high angle axe handle and sunset flip for two by Badd. It’s crazy seeing Masa sell these punches.
-Sonny is grabbed on the apron, allowing Badd to be blindsided and thrown over the top rope. The bell rings. Kimberly gets in the ring and Saito stalks her. The face makes the save and dropkicks his opponent to the floor.
WINNER: Johnny B Badd in 5:51 to tie the score 2-2 by DQ
-Badd totally whiffs on the dive after the official announcement.
FINAL WORD: Being hard hitting, yet abrupt and weird, makes you better than a Lex Luger match every day of the week.
-Heenan keeps “accidentally” rooting for Japan as Tony previews SuperBrawl. Gene talks to Lex Luger and Jimmy Hart backstage. There’s a weird inside joke about short fuses between Gene and Jimmy. Lex talks at a very fast speed. Some words are suspect, but it’s mostly fine. He says he’ll go into the triangle match without Hart. He flexes to wrap it up. Phew, that was like walking on egg shells.
The score is tied for Shinjiro Otani, representing the new generation of NJPW at 24 years old. He’s dressed like a Young Lion. Eddie Guerrero enters to his babyface rock theme and a good pop. I’ve always loved that jacket he’s wearing. Dusty calls this a “pivotable” situation. Okay, he’s leaning towards LVP definitely.
MATCH NUMBER FIVE: WORLD CUP OF WRESTLING MATCH- Shinjiro Otani w/Sonny Onoo vs Eddie Guerrero
- “Eddie” chants to start bother Otani. Lots of eye rakes and hair pulling follow.
-Tony does an ad read about their partnership and Bobby shits all over it. Eddie wakes the crowd up with a great headscissors.
-Patented slingshot senton by Eddie before a Boston Crab. HIGH impact folding powerbomb only gets a two and THEN he hits a sick brainbuster. He would be an MVP candidate without that promo earlier.
-Otani hits two amazing springboards: one is a dropkick into the ring and the other is a cross body to the floor.
-The back and forth between Dusty and Brain are humorous, but distracting as Shinjiro grounds Eddie.
-Springboard spinning heel kick! That’s cool as fuck! Dusty notably doesn’t know Chris Cruise’s first name. Great hurricanrana from the top rope by Guerrero.
-The ref is counting very slowly. It’s noticeable on a Splash Mountain Bomb for a long two.
-A brawl on the floor leads to a sensational backwards springboard crossbody by Eddie. Otani answers by kicking his head off with a springboard dropkick from behind.
-The crowd really gets into the end of this one. Counters back and forth off of roll ups leads to one ultimately doing the trick.
WINNER: Shinjiro Otani in 13:43 to put NJPW up 3-2 with a sunset flip roll up
-Eddie is very upset over the loss. The replays are awesome. Otani’s nose is bloody and Bobby is happy Japan is up. I wonder if Sonny Onoo has pictures of him in compromising positions like Jennifer Aniston as a dentist (and one more reference to go).
FINAL WORD: That was a great showcase of Eddie’s breakthrough talent and Otani made me an instant fan.
-Gene interviews Macho Man. It’s all up to him and Sting. Look at all of those colors. He’s forgetting about the triangle match for now. You can tell Toy Story just came out because Randy says “to infinity and beyond” twice. Then, he quotes the Doors. Here’s a great quote as well: “Tenzan, you can’t understand what I’m saying, but I’m coming to get ya!” What a bucket of energy. He forgets his catchphrase upon exiting, so he comes back to say it.
-Complete with ridiculous headgear, “Tensan” enters. His theme sounds like an Asian themed CBS sitcom. Randy Savage enters to the pop of the night. An old lady with a Santa hat reading “Macho Man” is very happy to high five her man.
MATCH NUMBER SIX: WORLD CUP OF WRESTLING MATCH- Hiroyoshi Tenzan w/Sonny Onoo vs Randy Savage
-Nice colors on Tenzan. This match looks very 90s out of the corner of your eye. It’s mostly crowd work amid lock ups and breaks. The commentators talk about Flair later and Dusty says “Bobby” like 10 times in a row a la Surfin’ Bird.
-Randy almost punches the ref on accident as Tenzan punches and grinds him. Tenzan shows good intensity no-selling head shots and hitting a snug spinning heel kick right into the champ’s injured arm.
-A headbutt from the top only gets a two count. Man, Savage gives this kid a lot. He misses a moonsault and Savage can barely suplex his opponent back into the ring. Fuck it, let’s go home then!
WINNER: Randy Savage in 6:53 to make the score 3-3 with the flying elbow drop
FINAL WORD: Macho is so limited at the moment and Tenzan sure tried, but it was ultimately pretty blah.
-Bobby is “distracted” according to Dusty and he does a great bit with fumbling his notes, chair and headset. Gene interviews Ric Flair in a pink Gold’s Gym shirt. He slyly avoided competing in the World Cup. He talks about being fresh and invigorated later. It’s boilerplate Nature Boy beyond that.
-It’s Sudden Death time. Kensuke Sasaki enters with the U.S. Title. There’s a very plain looking trophy at ringside. Sting enters with the American flag and pyro aplenty. Dusty calls Bobby an “ignoramus” for making fun of our country and I’m shocked he didn’t mess that word up.
MATCH NUMBER SEVEN: WORLD CUP OF WRESTLING MATCH- Kensuke Sasaki w/Sonny Onoo vs Sting
-Sasaki jumps Sting at the bell, but the captain fights back and hits an early Stinger Splash. He’s driven to the mat with a bulldog counter soon afterwards.
-Kensuke is just a random move guy. I don’t like the flow of his matches. He’s got a killer Snow Plow though.
-It’s still all Sasaki as he locks in the Scorpion Death Lock on the master of the hold. Sting powers out as Dusty and Bobby cheerlead for both sides.
-A “leg dreg” takedown comment means Tony gets made fun of even more. Sting launches into an awesome, fiery comeback and the place EXPLODES when he locks in the real deal. Kensuke tries powering up, but gets dragged back to the middle of the ring. He finally gives it up.
WINNER: Sting in 6:53 to win the World Cup for WCW 4-3 with the Scorpion Death Lock
FINAL WORD: That was a basic and anticlimactic finish to the tournament, but it was satisfying because Sting was awesome.
-Team WCW comes down to celebrate the win. The heels trail behind as a big “USA” chant rings out. The replay shows how great Sting’s closing flurry was. Gene presents the trophy in-ring. Benoit is wearing a Horsemen shirt while everyone else wears event shirts. Sting keeps it simple and Gene wants this to be an annual tradition. Lex bogarts the trophy. Brain is distraught and claims he has to give the Lexus back. Dusty adds “and the rickshaw!”
-A video package for the Triangle match makes sure to discuss the “video error” related to Hulk’s elimination from World War 3. Lex has been acting strange since his return in September and Sting has had some bizarre instances, too. Loyalty is constantly questioned. Flair’s advantage is quickly mentioned. The match will have tag rules. Luger is out first on his lonesome. Flair enters to a surefire pop. Tony recaps his Starrcade’s victories of the past- mostly against Dusty. He responds by claiming to have been in a triangle match with Schiavone? Sting comes back out and immediately pushes Flair down. There was supposed to be a coin toss, but Sting and Ric just start as Jack Daniels is appropriately brought up.
MATCH NUMBER EIGHT: TRIANGLE MATCH FOR WCW TITLE SHOT- Lex Luger vs Ric Flair vs Sting
-A press slam and Scorpion Death Lock attempt makes Flair leave the ring early. The semantics of the coin toss happening backstage (possibly) are discussed. Poor Dream is so lost. There’s lots of slow ground work by Flair so far.
-Sting furthers his MVP run with a great spot: he no sells a chop and Flair struts away with his back turned, but Sting mockingly struts him into a corner before a hip toss and beat down.
-What the fuck did Dusty just say about playing possum?!?! Brain can’t even joke about it! Ric throws Sting over the top into the steps after goading Lex into a distraction.
-Sting fires up with a superplex and more gorilla slams. He goes for the pin and Lex comes in to break it up, but Sting catches him. This finally causes a tag at the ten-minute mark.
-Flair tries to escape up the aisle, but Lex carries him back. Something is wrong with Bobby’s headset. Dusty’s is sadly fine. He’s likely to say something nonsensical like bending him over to show you the 50 states (and our reference challenge is over).
-The crowd loves Ric’s typical antics. He starts going for Lex’s legs and hits them with a chair behind the ref’s back. He locks in the Figure Four after a low blow, but Luger turns it.
-Flair goes to the top and gets CAUGHT, continuing his bad streak. Chops are no sold and Flair has finally had enough, tagging Sting in. He almost forgot to.
-After a stare down for several moments, the friends shake hands to boos and lock up. Clean breaks and a lack of action gets more boos. Sting finally bursts with punches and clotheslines. Lex begs off and asks for a timeout.
-Man, this is boring. More “action” leads to a double down, but Flair’s on the apron and has no reason to worry. The match structure stinks.
-The Scorpion is blocked and Luger throws an “errant” low blow.
-Sting smartly avoids whipping Luger into the corner with Flair and hits the Splash elsewhere. He misses another and the ref gets hit with Sting’s boot. Ric throws both men over the top rope and the ref is woken up in enough time to count. Lex grabs Sting at the last second to keep him from getting back in. That’s creative and cheap.
WINNER: Ric Flair in 28:03 by countout
FINAL WORD: That was none of their best outings, but it was more the fault of the match type and heat than the participants themselves.
-Flair celebrates while Lex appears to apologize to Sting. He’s left to tend to his hurt knee as Sting leaves. Jimmy Hart comes out to talk to Flair and help him? None of this makes much sense. The commentators analyze on screen as Flair waits. Heenan is great in these segments in regards to Flair as usual. The champ walks out and takes the mic from Michael Buffer to say “OH YEAH.” Buffer does his big, bloated intro. Savage’s role as a Slim Jim spokesman is an actual part of his spiel.
MATCH NUMBER NINE: WCW TITLE MATCH- Ric Flair w/Jimmy Hart vs Randy Savage (Champ)
-Jabs by Macho early as Paul Orndorff comes down to watch in a neck brace. He was taken out by the Horsemen weeks earlier. Tony calls Pillman the “Loose Cannon” for the first time.
-Savage is caught in the stomach on an axe handle attempt to the floor. Mr. Wonderful is escorted to the back. The bad arm is focused on. Hart gets a sneak attack kick in while Bobby makes fun of a lady’s head in the front row. I was doing it at the same time!
-This lacks the intensity and action of their previous battles. Macho Man looks very limited.
-Hart distracts the ref and throws his megaphone. Flair still gets hit with it and comes up BLOODY AS FUCK. Savage hits an impressive flying elbow from ¾ of the way across the ring. The ref is still with Jimmy, so Pillman and Benoit try to attack, but get thwarted. Arn Anderson is luckier with a foreign object shot.
-RIC FLAIR IS FUCKING DISGUSTING.
WINNER: Ric Flair in 8:43 to win the title after an Arn Anderson punch with a foreign object
-The crowd and Pillman are equally over the moon with this. Pillman grabs the title and whips Savage with it. Macho is beat down while Flair tries to get his face clean with a towel.
FINAL WORD: Flair’s face is a good analogy for the end of this show: a total mess.
-There’s no interview with the new champ because he needs medical attention. The commentators recap the whole show and put over 1996 and Nitro. Bobby claims Nashville is going to party tonight and gets a “Will you stop” from Tony that isn’t as good as Gorilla as they sign off.
THE LAST IMAGE: Tony Schiavone, Dusty Rhodes and Bobby Heenan
THE WRAP UP
FINAL MVP of PPV: Sting was the most popular guy on the whole show, had visible fun and really shone with his passion and in-ring action.
FINAL LVP of PPV: Tony Schiavone, the entire Japanese team and the audience themselves were disrespected throughout the broadcast by Dusty Rhodes and his distracting bullshit.
MY FAVORITE MATCH: Jushin Thunder Liger vs Chris Benoit
MY LEAST FAVORITE MATCH: Lex Luger vs Masahiro Chono
FINAL THOUGHTS: That wasn’t as good of a show that I was expecting with the New Japan stars, but it was still entertaining for a gimmick Starrcade. The cutting-edge action made this one, but plenty of overbooking and problems dragged it down into only a minorly good show. I think I’m just glad 1995 is finally over. MULLET RECOMMENDS
NEXT TIME: We enter 1996 with the Royal Rumble and our 100th entry. Holy fucking shit.