It’s crazy that one show can feel like the end of an era in so many ways, both positively and negatively. It doesn’t attract that much attention in that way, but Slamboree 1994 is very much that show.
It’s fitting that we focus on the legends of the past as WCW was previously the NWA and the tradition and pedigree of that lineage has always made the company seem distinguished. That will soon fade away as the Hulk Hogan parade is coming to town.
Long term, that will lead to the most prosperous period in WCW’s history. It will also lead to some dreadful decisions and shows and, depending on who you ask, the company’s downfall.
These shows are so interesting to me because there’s been no middle ground. So far, shows like this one either make me pine for the new era or made me sad that it’s over because good things were happening.
I write these introductions after watching the show and typing out all of my votes. As I type this now, I still do not know which of the two spectrums the show falls on. Read and decide for yourself.
PAY PER VIEW NUMBER 73: WCW SLAMBOREE 1994
Written on 7/18/21
THE FIRST THING YOU SEE: Clips of the legends followed by a 4X4 image of current stars accompanied by that banger of a Slamboree theme. We go live in Philly and that makes back-to-back months of dope wrestling crowds for WCW. Mean Gene wearing glasses welcomes us to the show and introduces the legends. Let’s break them down, shall we?
-Ole Anderson: misses his cue right out of the gate
-The Assassin: still getting booed
-Penny Banner: random as hell
-Red Bastien: doesn’t wait for his name to be announced
-Tully Blanchard: gets a big pop and already dressed to compete
-The Crusher: rocking sunglasses and a stogie
-Don Curtis: looks like a vice principal
-Terry Funk: doesn’t show up
-Verne Gagne: totally confused about everything
-Hard Boiled Haggerty: one hell of a ‘stache
-Larry Henning: badass as usual
-Killer Kowalski: surprisingly making a non-WWF appearance
-Ernie Ladd: still a BEAST
-Wahoo McDaniel: shown nice respect
-Angelo Mosca: resembles a pit boss at a casino
-Harley Race: big heat because he’s an active character
-Ray Stevens: chewing the shit out of that gum
-Lou Thesz: hates half of these guys
-Johnny Weaver: seems to be wearing an oversized name tag
-Mr. Wrestling II: just has the disposition of a nice man
-Tommy Young: good to see him again
-Woof, that was long, but a nice moment.
-Tony Schiavone and Bobby Heenan are ringside even though Gene said Jesse the Body on accident. Ric Flair’s opponent tonight is a mystery. ECW’s Hat Guy is right behind them. Nick Bockwinkel appears with the Big Gold Belt and asks Sting to join them. He walks to ringside in a red suit, no facepaint and volleyball glasses. A riveting statement is read about Sting’s match with Rick Rude in Japan being ruled a no contest and Rude getting stripped of the title. His career is sadly over. Sting wants no favors and wants to earn the title by wrestling Vader tonight. Bockwinkel agrees and over-speaks his way into an LVP early. Speaking of legendary fans, VLADIMIR!!!
-Johnny B. Badd’s music hits and Michael Buffer introducing him is a match made in heaven. He has the pandering phrase “Philly Rules” in glitter on his robe and pyro shooting out of his hands. The crowd seems indifferent, but love the Blasters. Steve Austin enters with Col. Parker and gets a very good reaction, mixed and loud. Philly always knows and Steve is amped. His energy and charisma make him the first MVP while Tony puts over Philly as a tough town.
MATCH NUMBER ONE: US TITLE MATCH- Johnny B. Badd vs Steve Austin w/Col. Robert Parker (Champ)
-Back and forth grappling to start. Badd mostly controls it, but Steve is playing mind games that Bobby likes.
-Bill Apter sighting ringside taking pictures and “Sensuous” Sherri is shown sitting in the front row. The crowd chants “K-Mart suit” at Parker.
-Still working a side headlock with occasional bursts of action before settling into another worked hold.
-Badd hits a nice victory roll headscissors counter and cross body for two. Heenan makes the most 1994 joke ever by claiming Parker is more worried than Tom Arnold in divorce court.
-Austin nails a nice axe handle to the face to pop the crowd as commentators argue over the Phillies, name dropping John Kruk specifically.
-The arena floor is covered in his own glitter and it’s so obnoxious. Austin hits a cool, running suplex and knee drop.
- “We’re not hostile” chant by the crowd and the commentators mention it. Oh boy, it’s going to be a long night.
-Johnny is on a roll and Parker distracts the ref during a roll up. The heel accidentally hits his manager and it leads to a good two count…so good, the bell is rung. A top rope sunset flip and Austin is STILL kicking out. He’s awesome.
-Well, that was a messy as fuck ending that looked like shit.
WINNER: Steve Austin in 16:15 with a belly-to-back counter into a pin
-The KO punch connects after the bell and the champ sells it like death, falling out of the ring. Tony calls Badd the winner on accident.
FINAL WORD: Pretty boring until the final two minutes sadly.
-Okerlund pimps the hotline and the question of the night: should Cactus Jack be banned from wrestling? Jesus, what did he do? Wahoo and Ladd join him. Ladd speaks so cool while Wahoo talks like an old, lost man and admits to selling the blankets Heenan makes fun of him for.
-Dusty Rhodes in front of the Hollywood sign is rhyming about a project he’s working on. It’s hopefully no more of his mini-movies. He claims to be unretired before calling his son his “brother” and tells him to watch his back before making a crazy face to wrap it up. Totally unnecessary.
-Chris Jericho’s future “Basketball Highlights #2” theme leads Tully Blanchard to an amazing pop. He’s cocky and still seems to have it. He’s probably high. The “ruthless and unpredictable” Terry Funk enters to much fanfare. Just the intros alone are better than all three legends matches from the last Slamboree. Gordon Solie calling the action with Heenan will be a treat. I just heard the first “ECW” chant in PPV history while Terry celebrates in the crowd. He throws his stirrups at Tully and gets them thrown back in his face. Then, they start slapping and slugging the shit out of each other on the floor. Hell yeah!
MATCH NUMBER TWO: Tully Blanchard vs Terry Funk
-Funk throws random crutches from a fan at ringside, then delivers a big atomic drop into the rail and threatens to slap the cameraman.
-Tully is called a son of a bitch while slapping Tully on the ramp and grabs a piece of paneling to hit Tully in the face unprotected. Back in the ring, Terry delivers a piledriver on the wooden piece, shattering it against the ropes. He’s for sure the MVP now.
-DDT on the ramp! This “legends” match is more action packed than the mid-card title match. Solie lends a solid voice to the proceedings while explaining Nick Patrick’s backstory.
-A “we want blood” chant starts and I notice how out of his league Brain is with Gordon. Another piledriver before a missed MOONSAULT by the crazy old man.
-SNUG strikes back and forth leads to the ref getting bumped on an Irish whip. Funk immediately gets a chair, opens it up and tries a superplex? WTF?!?! Nope, it’s a super piledriver instead and it’s totally botched. Terry ends up just sitting in the seat and that disappoints the crowd.
-The ref gets up and Tully kicks him, Funk is using his branding iron now and the bell finally rings.
WINNER: Double DQ in 7:12
-Chants of “bullshit” ring out as Funk climbs into the crowd, takes Hat Guy’s trademark and puts it on before dropping an elbow and headbutting it. What a legend and MVP. He threatens Bobby and stumbles off.
FINAL WORD: That was insane in the best possible way.
-Solie promotes a shirt and program deal before sending to Jesse Ventura backstage. Ric Flair enters in a crazy shirt. His beatdown on WCW Saturday Night by Parker’s masked man is recapped. He talks about Terry Funk and claims Philly likes it hot and heavy in a so-so promo. Jesse ends it with the world’s worst WOO.
-Epic sounding music for the next non-title affair and Larry Zbyszko as a babyface. He is billed as “The Legend” and the music has transitioned into something from a jazz piano club. It sounds like Ryan Gosling working out material at his own club. Is that a La La Land reference challenge? Sigh…fine. Lord Steven Regal and Sir William walk to the ring. They get more hated every single time. Regal thinks Philly is “the worst city on the planet” according to Schiavone. A “WCW Rules, WWF Stink” sign makes Tony say “oh boy!”
MATCH NUMBER THREE: NON-TITLE MATCH- Larry Zbyszko vs Lord Steven Regal w/Sir William
--Regal wastes a lot of time barely acknowledging Larry. They go to lock up finally at 2:08, but it’s just a trip. Larry legendarily does very little if he can.
-A spin kick to Regal’s tummy makes him bail and yell at people.
-Zbyszko uses the ropes in an ab stretch and the crowd defends him in a bit of fun.
-Sherri is shown taking notes as the pace picks up a tiny bit.
-Regal gets frustrated and unloads uppercuts. “BORING” catcalls start during some heel rest holds. A backslide is blocked and it’s transitioned into a crossbow submission that gets some “oohs” from the crowd.
-An umbrella shot is missed by the ref and a butterfly hold is hooked, but countered leading to a crowd explosion.
WINNER: Larry Zbyszko in 11:37 with a butterfly bridge pin
FINAL WORD: That was unfortunately pedestrian.
-Mean Gene talks about an appointment in Orlando with Hulk Hogan before welcoming Terry Funk in to ask why he didn’t show up at the beginning of the show. He speaks in a calm tone talking about the legends and says he’s “THE” legend. He shits on Philly and calls himself “hardcore.” It’s totally bonkers and takes advantage of the live mic to call Dusty an “egg sucking dog.” He says we haven’t seen the last of him tonight. He’s the MVP even more.
-Solie is in the ring at a podium for the Hall of Fame ceremony. Lou Thesz is presenting the plaques. The first inductee is Harley Race. I didn’t know he had an auto accident that threatened his career and he broke Thesz’s record for number of reigns. He ultimately gets a respectful reaction.
-The second inductee is the Crusher for his AWA work. Solie is probably pissed. I’m pretty sure all of these people are sadly dead now. Gordon is great at this, even selling pain on a handshake. MVP. Out third is Ernie Ladd with his dope background. Next is the Assassin and his neck just gets fatter and fatter. I can’t tell if his face is too fat or he’s getting emotional over this. It’s not Emma Stone’s audition, but still nice (and we have one more reference to go).
-Ole Anderson is next and he has never cried a day in his life. This is the most normal he’s ever looked. The final person is no longer with us and that’s Dick the Bruiser. His daughter and some stout motherfucker accept on his behalf. Solie talks about his charity work and I’m not going to look him up and potentially have him ruined for me because he’s sounds great. A nice story is told about his grandson saying that heaven needed a tough one. This was a fine ceremony if not too long and dry.
-Ventura interviews Col. Parker to discuss the upcoming Bullrope match and Flair’s opponent. He doesn’t say much of anything. Bobby says some nice words about Dick the Bruister before Dustin Rhodes enters dressed for a street fight holding a bullrope. Bunkhouse Buck is next, mad as usual. They go right after each other. The rope is not tied, but the bell still rings.
MATCH NUMBER FOUR: BULLROPE MATCH- Dustin Rhodes vs Bunkhouse Buck w/Col. Robert Parker
-The rope is wrapped around Buck’s neck and there’s lots of choking before Dustin finally connects them at the wrist.
-This is much calmer and slower than last month. The crowd is reacting in kind. Buck takes a couple shots to the dick.
-Philly chants “we want blood!” Don’t encourage Dustin. Buck has looked like shit so far, selling very weird and bumping poorly. He’s an LVP threat.
-Nothing like working on the knee in a bullrope match. Dustin’s shirt is pulled over his head while he’s beaten. That makes him look ridiculous.
-Rhodes is tied to the post and beaten up until he hits a low blow and it’s sold horrifically. A bell to the head leads to more blood chants. Bobby thought it was a USA chant and he pivots after being corrected, claiming his waitress said that when taking his omlette order.
-The ref is bumped in between both men. Parker enters, but begs off right away. Dustin gets grabbed from behind, but fights the two heels off and swings away.
WINNER: Dustin Rhodes at 12:48 with a cowbell shot to the head
-Terry Funk runs out as soon as the bell rings and hits Dustin in the face UNPROTECTED with a branding iron. Dustin is bleeding right away and sandbags a spike piledriver attempt because he may be legit hurt. Officials run out while Terry Funk is the most over person on the show.
FINAL WORD: That was a shell of their last battle, but it wasn’t overall bad per se.
-The commentators recap the Rhodes and Funk family history as Dustin is helped to the back. Bobby is going to head back to see what’s going on. Mean Gene interviews Red Bastien and Ray Stevens. Ray’s gravelly voice doesn’t miss in-ring action and Red talks too much about wrestling today. Gene just wants a cold one.
-Jesse joins Tony in the booth as 2001 plays. Flair enters to a massive pop in his gold robe first because Parker didn’t want his guy to come out yet. In an interesting trivial tidbit, Parker walks to the ring to the future Four Horsemen/Arn Anderson theme. Is this where Arn gets it from?!?! Parker introduces the mystery man: Barry Windham to a good reaction. He looks a little chunkier, but still decent. It cuts to a sign about Hulk Hogan right away. I don’t like his chances. Michael Buffer still does the formal intro for Flair and botches the ref’s last name (“Randy Peterson”).
MATCH NUMBER FIVE: WCW TITLE MATCH- Barry Windham w/Col. Robert Parker vs Ric Flair (Champ)
-Chops are no sold early and Barry looks good. Jesse’s silence as Tony talks about Hulk on commentary is telling.
-The mat is disgusting with Dustin’s blood while Barry hits a good clothesline. It’s all him, but Ric is trying to retaliate with more chops, but he’s still whipped out with his corner flop.
-Flair climbs to the top and gets CAUGHT in a superplex. Windham rolls over, but only gets a two. That should have been a bigger false finish considering it’s Barry’s signature moves.
-The Nature Boy hits his own suplex and locks in the Figure Four dead center to a pop. Just don’t get the shoulders on the mat this time. He gets to the ropes, but it’s reapplied and broken by the ropes once more.
-Flair comes off the top rope and it’s a SUCCESS with a fist to the head. Crazily enough, the Steamboat rematch was the previous week. A slow crossbody over the top, but Flair still does a flop on the floor.
-Parker takes a chop on the floor, but gets up to help on a sunset flip attempt. The ref naturally catches him.
-No wonder why he didn’t come off the top rope a lot. That said, it’s a SUCCESS keeping him above .500 lifetime and earning a rare win with it.
WINNER: Ric Flair in 13:23 to retain the title with a top rope crossbody
FINAL WORD: The chemistry is just not there anymore between these two, but once again, this was necessarily bad.
-Jesse mentions that he always gets in trouble at Bash at the Beach and that segues into a REALLY cheesy commercial featuring Mean Gene, The Brain, surfboards and bikinis. Man, the 90s rules and sucked all at once. Gene promotes the hotline and welcomes Don Curtis and the Crusher. Don is too old to be good at talking, so Gene tries to get him in trouble with his wife. Crusher talks about Dick the Bruister murdering people in heaven and wanting to drink a lot after the show.
-Dave Schultz from the Philadelphia Flyers talks about being the special enforcer for the Street Fight and clips of him punching people on the ice play. It’s such an odd juxtaposition to his current look and demeanor. Buffer sounds bored announcing the Broad Street Bully Street Fight and Schultz. Dave also seems disinterested in being here. Cactus Jack and Kevin Sullivan, wearing a Phillies jersey, enter. Did Maxx Payne get shown the door and was Evad hurt? The match rules are anything goes and falls count anywhere. The Nasty Boys enter and look determined. This naturally starts right away.
MATCH NUMBER SIX: TAG TITLE BROAD STREET BULLY STREET FIGHT WITH SPECIAL GUEST ENFORCER DAVID SCHULTZ- Cactus Jack and Kevin Sullivan vs The Nasty Boys (Champs)
-It’s total chaos as usual. Knobbs takes crutches to the back and Sags is the first to eat an UNPROTECTED chair shot on camera. Sullivan gets one soon after and I’m pretty sure Jack took one I couldn’t see. Just for the sake of matches like this, I’ll give you a final tally at the end (mostly because I will rewatch this afterwards to make sur I got them all). Kevin has the nerve to throw a dropkick in the ring, but hits a piledriver on the ramp, too.
-Trash cans to the head still count. I just noticed Jesse is still on commentary. The UNPROTECTED shots are insane. Sullivan hits a double stomp. Somewhere in the middle of this, Cactus got hit with a shoot fire extinguisher to the back.
-Jack tries a second rope elbow, but misses and flattens a trash can. Then, he gets hit in the head with it THREE TIMES.
-Sags stole a camera from someone and swung it at Cactus. Five more UNPROTECTED hits to go around and Sullivan is fighting them off. Sags forces one on him. Tony and Jesse are laughing and loving this.
-Sags has a table and Cactus is bleeding. That naturally means Mick Foley is hip tossed off the ramp through the damn thing. That’s dumb in any year and bonkers in 1994. Knobbs’ brain is scrambled while Jack is beaten over the back with an open light stand. The broken table is suplexed onto Sags again.
-Face shots with a trash can lid are coming in pairs now. Captain America is name dropped by Schiavone while Kevin takes three lid shots to the dome. In one of the grossest moments of all time, Sags gags over some fire extinguisher smoke.
-Even more UNPROTECTED weapons to the head and Sags hits his top rope elbow. Instead of pinning, he pushes Schultz and grabs his hockey stick. Dave takes it back and pulls the tank top over Jerry’s head, hitting shitty worked punches. That gives Jack enough time to use the stick and take advantage of the fastest three count ever.
WINNERS: Cactus Jack and Kevin Sullivan in 9:34 to win the titles when Jack pins Jerry Sags with a hockey stick shot
-Jack lets out a wild scream after the bell and Sags starts beating him up. Thankfully, they are working shots to the face. Maxx Payne is still employed and kabongs Sags from behind with a gnarly UNPROTECTED guitar shot to the head. He seems legit KO’ed. Knobbs is backed down the ramp and Dave Sullivan comes out on crutches. Knobbs takes a crutch shot across the chest. How did this family get revealed as a thing?
FINAL WORD: That was somehow wilder than Spring Stampede which means I loved it even more. Philly got a real treat. The UNPROTECTED tallies: Cactus Jack and Kevin Sullivan eight each and the Nasty Boys six each.
-The replay shows that winning stick shot was thankfully in the shoulder. I love that Jesse wonders what Lou Thesz thought about that. The trainers check on Sags and Tony is noticeably happier with Jesse next to him. The main event is previewed as Knobbs finally helps Sags up.
-Mean Gene segues that last match into his stupid Cactus Jack hotline question. The crowd shouts “NO” every time it’s brought up. He welcomes Thesz and Gagne to ask their impression of the last bout. Verne talks about Bockwinkel and shits over it as just a brawl. Lou is surprisingly a little nicer because he realizes he shouldn’t bury the product that’s paying him.
-Vader’s music makes the crowd immediately stir. Heenan has returned and claims Funk jumped and disrobed Red Bastien. The big man is a little smiley and puts over Harley’s Hall of Fame induction on the walk out. Sting has his orange and blue attire with big pyro. Buffer handles the introductions and his suit looks like he’s about to back up John Legend on the road (and my reference challenge is complete). Vader’s intro is always awesome. He may be creeping into my top five favorites ever after all of this is over. Vladimir gets a close-up saying Sting is number one.
MATCH NUMBER SEVEN: VACANT INTERNATIONAL TITLE MATCH- Vader w/Harley Race vs Sting
-Vader cockily clean breaks and bows against the ropes. He’s always surprising me. A vocal minority starts a “Sting must die” chant.
-Tons of clubbing blows by Vader and Sting eventually dishes his own, knocking Vader to the floor and causing him to lose his mask.
-Sting hits a delayed vertical suplex before multiple collisions have neither man budging. Vader eventually knocks Sting down and hits his low elbow.
-Two Vader Bombs and Bobby mentions Sting’s old broken ribs. The big man slaps on a leg grapevine in a rare rest hold. Sting sells it great.
-Sting wakes up with an explosion of punches that takes Vader off of his feet. He can’t capitalize and gets grinded down again.
-A flying clothesline knocks the ref down and Vader hits a cool chokeslam. Nobody is available to count and the crowd has started a “911” chant after that chokeslam to keep the ECW references going.
-Race accidentally hits Vader with an UNPROTECTED chair shot. A DDT follow up only gets a two count. Sting hits two clotheslines over the top rope and no DQ is called.
-A splash is caught in the corner and countered into a slam. The Vadersault gets a great pop, but is missed. Sting covers, Harley tries the headbutt from the top, but hits his man. The ref throws him out and Sting gets AIR.
WINNER: Sting at 13:54 to win the title with a top rope splash
FINAL WORD: It wasn’t their best, but it’s always good.
-The win gets a great pop. Sting raises his arms in celebration and the replay shows Race really connected on that headbutt. Pyro finally goes off.
-Tony and Bobby recap the show and Vader threatens them as usual after a loss, hitting the ring post with a chair. They remind viewers about Bash at the Beach and Hulk Hogan’s interview. Bobby is losing his voice and “Weasel” chants welcome that. Some asshole dressed like Hulk Hogan appears behind Tony while he signs off. A quick shot of all the empty seats and credit!
THE LAST IMAGE: Wide Shot of the Arena
THE WRAP UP
FINAL MVP of PPV: Far and away, the craziest and most entertaining thing on this show was Terry Funk. It’s good to have this bastard back.
FINAL LVP of PPV: I had surprisingly high hopes for Bunkhouse Buck’s impressive debut and he fucked up all of his goodwill with this odd performance tonight.
MY FAVORITE MATCH: Cactus Jack and Kevin Sullivan vs The Nasty Boys
MY LEAST FAVORITE MATCH: Larry Zbyszko vs Lord Steven Regal
FINAL THOUGHTS: Ehhhhh….I don’t know what to say. Nothing was bad at all, but enough was boring or too simple. The Philly crowd carried the show at point, but I don’t watch a PPV for the audience. I watch for great matches and there was one (sorta). I watch for good performances and that was one solely. I don’t watch for overboard nostalgia and neutral action while we wait for the red and yellow elephant in the room. MULLET DOESN’T RECOMMEND
NEXT TIME: If you know me personally, you know why I’m so excited to watch the 1994 King of the Ring next week. Thinking about watching it, I wonder HOW MUCH THAT WILL WEIGH ON ME.