I have gone over my love of bad entertainment before. As an example, I chose to watch the Tom Arnold/Rick Moranis comedy Big Bully instead of Saving Private Ryan the other day when I was recovering from my second COVID shot. I’m definitely the first person to ever do that.
That started subconsciously as a child as noted in the Great American Bash 1991 entry. Today’s show is another one of those cases. I watched Fall Brawl 1993 a lot as a youth for no particular reason. The only thing I can assume is my penchant for oddball characters that matter absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things. This show is the poster child for that concept.
Upon further review and retrospect, this show might not fit that bill.
It might just be too bad.
What constitutes too bad for the guy that has watched every Leprechaun movie? What does it mean to cross the line of quality to the man who has MacArthur Park on his workout playlist? What sucks when I bought the Pam Anderson TV series Stacked on DVD?
Read and get the answers you seek.
PAY PER VIEW NUMBER 64: WCW FALL BRAWL 1993
Written on 4/28/2021
THE FIRST THING YOU SEE: Clips from the old days amidst school bells and a voiceover about everything being well…until WCW invades Houston. There’s a Risk motif as the three title matches are previewed on a game board. War Games is mentioned as well and I get my first PPV glimpse at the Shockmaster’s dumbass helmet. Oh boy, this is an auspicious intro. Big pyro LIVE as Tony Schiavone and Jesse Ventura welcome us. Jesse is calling the crowd “Texicans” already while the crowd chants “Houston.” I don’t like any of this.
-Eric Bischoff is surprisingly not announcing any changes to the card and previews the title matches again before asking MICHAEL BUFFER to take it away. Lord Steven Regal and Sir William enter with some sparkler pyro. Ventura is an early LVP with his reliance on the Texican schtick. Their headsets also sound awkward, specifically Body’s. The Slam Jam song is gone and Ricky Steamboat has his good song back. He’s the TV Champion and blows fire while his dragon headdress is used as décor. Tony claims 2,000 people are being turned away and still filing in. Buffer does the formal info for no reason. This is a waste of money. There must be a lot of people filing in because there are a LOT of empty seats. There are chunks everywhere. All of Regal’s European championships are highlighted, but only Steamboat’s U.S. Title is mentioned.
MATCH NUMBER ONE: TV TITLE MATCH- Lord Steven Regal w/Sir William vs Ricky Steamboat (Champion)
-Ricky jumps his opponent at the bell as the commentators mention his taped ribs after an umbrella attack the previous night. Loud chops and strikes to start.
-A bright light is shone in the ring. At least the lights are on. Regal takes a hard spill on the runway. Steamboat hits a big chop off the top, but keeps selling his injury. He’s an early MVP.
-Great counter whip to the corner and Regal is screaming in this hammerlock. Steamboat always brings the intensity.
-The face blatantly plays possum in a cool moment. A loud, obnoxious fan calls it out. He’s also trying to start a big “Regal sucks” chant.
-Third “Texican” reference by Ventura along with another fast sequence ending with a Dragon crossbody for two. Tony recaps the title win against Paul Orndorff at Clash of the Champions and Orndorff’s role in the beatdown last night.
-Lord Steven performs a good deadlift out of an arm scissors, but Ricky rolls through as the announcers keep sounding like WCW Radio. Maybe JR will be calling that soon, too.
-A heel backdrop starts the focus on the ribs and takeover. A nice rolling senton gets an Edouard Carpentier name drop as the champ is grounded and grinded.
-Steamboat hits an Electric Chair drop, but takes knees to the injured ribs on a splash attempt.
-A Ventura-like backbreaker submission makes Tony and Jesse argue over how many wins he got with it leads to a surfboard stretch without the bend.
-The tape is ripped off before a beautiful butterfly suplex for two. Ricky answers back with a hard catapult, but he can’t keep the momentum. Jesse insists he should slap the referee to survive.
-Regal tries a Tombstone like Rick Rude, but it gets countered like Rick Rude and Steamboat hits a very slow version that deflates the crowd for a two count. I have to point out that WCW has way more Tombstones than The Undertaker so far.
-Strikes and near falls as Ricky keeps fighting and trying to win. He goes to the top and hits the patented body press, but he rolls off and can’t keep Regal down because of his hurt ribs. Regal weakly kicked out as well.
-Regal throws his opponent over the top and Steamboat skins the cat. Regal distracts the ref so Sir William can drill Ricky in the head with an UNPROTECTED umbrella shot. It makes a loud thwack, but it’s not the finishing move.
WINNER: Lord Steven Regal at 17:05 to win the title with a bridging German suplex
-Gary Michael Cappetta handles the announcement because Buffer makes too much money to do that much work. The replay shows that the umbrella may have hit the shoulder as well, but he got enough of the head to still count it on my list. A small contingent of fans are very happy over the title change.
FINAL WORD: That was an underrated gem of a match. It was hard hitting and scientific from two pros.
-EB interviews the Nasty Boys who have jumped back to WCW. They are teasing a secret and shout all of their words. A top rope bulldog will end their match later. Sure, let’s go with a Nostradamus gimmick for them. I’ve missed them and now I already don’t.
-Generic music means it’s Big Sky AKA Sabretooth from the first X-Men movie to scattered boos. Even more generic music for his opponent, Charlie Norris, to even littler response. He looks goofy as shit. I think he’s a castaway from that party scene in Heavyweights (and there’s our reference challenge). Jesse claims he’s rich because casinos. Ha ha.
MATCH NUMBER TWO: Big Sky vs Charlie Norris
-Two lock ups and nothing happens. Finally, a wrist lock and a loud chop from Charlie. Sky says “shit” a bunch in his own wrist lock as a loud “WE WANT FLAIR” chant starts. Do they think Sky is Barry Windham?
-Sky keeps saying “shit” and complains to the ref a lot. “BORING” catcalls from that same vocal group already. They aren’t wrong.
-Big boot in the corner by Sky and he eventually hits a chokeslam after whatever back and forth they manage.
-Early Podswoggle podcasts sound better than the commentary quality right now. Knee from the second by Sky misses and Norris starts an odd war dance with chops.
-Before you know it, it’s thankfully over.
WINNER: Charlie Norris in 4:34 with a running big boot
-Norris celebrates like a big idiot as Jesse reminds us he’s still undefeated.
FINAL WORD: An absolutely mind-numbing match. Why was that anywhere let alone on PPV?
Tony and Jesse preview the rest of the show including a bonus tag match before sending it to special interviewer Scott Dunlap with Davey Boy Smith. Oh god, he’s actually “special.” I hope that’s not what they meant! He was a Dusty Rhodes drawl to his voice, but does a good job. Bulldog calls Harlem Heat sneaky and this reminds me that he shouldn’t be cutting promos. With a mental handicap, Dunlap is much better than Todd Pettengill or Joe Fowler.
-Paul Orndorff and the Equalize enter as the “Paula” shit starts immediately. It’s called a “special” interview again as Too Cold Scorpio and Marcus Alexander Bagwell walk to the ring. He’s STILL Rookie of the Year?!?!? Do they only give the award out every four years like the Olympics? Of course, he’s an LVP for Bagwell’s dancing and he’s added a thrust. Jesse gets a little room with a White Men Can’t Dance line, then advertises Demolition Man with Wesley Snipes.
MATCH NUMBER THREE: Paul Orndorff and The Equalizer vs Too Cold Scorpio and Marcus Alexander Bagwell
-Scorpio challenges the tag champs in the camera at the bell as Equalizer and Marcus start.
-One exaggerated miss in the corner by the heel means another Bagwell thrust. I’m in hell.
-Equalizer gets some tackles before missing an elbow and taking a double dropkick to the floor.
-Someone audibly complains about a blocked camera and Paul finally tags in. Scorpio hits his legs and butt hard on a double back drop.
-Scorpio and Paul have great chemistry as you’d expect. Can Equalizer and Bagwell be excused like a kid at the dinner table?
-Equalizer botches a count interruption, then pulls down the rope on Bagwell to make him spill to the floor. He’s finally an LVP. Jesse claims Bagwell wants his mom. Don’t wish Judy on me now.
-“Paula” is so fucking over, OMG. Bagwell is still beaten down in an Orndorff bearhug.
-Hot tag to Scorpio and an amazing flurry of boxing punches, spin kicks and dropkicks brings it up a notch. MVP.
-All four in and Scorpio takes a clothesline on a double Irish Whip. The heels are in command once again. A confusing scene leads to Orndorff kneeing Equalizer on accident to set up the finish. The big man has to kick out of the little man right away, huh?
WINNERS: Too Cold Scorpio and Marcus Alexander Bagwell in 10:46 when Scorpio pins Equalizer with a 450 splash.
-Scorpio is jumped after the bell and hit with a hideous leg drop by Equalizer. Orndorff flies in with a flying knee and Bagwell tries to save before selling a belly-to-back on his stomach. This was a mess of a post-match scene as the faces theme finally plays.
FINAL WORD: That was not needed as an added match, but I’ll never complain about more Orndorff or Scorpio.
-EB interviews the new TV Champ and his manager. Sir William’s accent is very shaky. Regal calls the city “debaucherous” and the people lowly. He claims he can be trusted and they leave. Nothing segment.
-Cowboy shit music, but it’s not Hangman. It’s Shanghai Pierce along with Tex Slazenger in rancher clothes. Pierce yells Texas and Tex is slapping hands. They are supposed to be heels. It’s hard to be heels against the epically bad theme and existence of ICE TRAIN. He’s a jacked black man in a black singlet choo-chooing seen as an extra in previous shows. Vince probably made a call about him and they gave him this random push.
MATCH NUMBER FOUR: Shanghai Pierce w/Tex Slazenger vs Ice Train
-Another Texas shout that actually gets boos as Jesse talks about something I don’t understand regarding Lee Harvey Oswald.
-Train choo-choos a LOT. Freight Train might honestly be better.
-A test of strength means Train gets suckered into strikes. Tex makes a distraction as well and Train is hit from behind. He sells poorly. VERY poorly.
-Slazenger gets on the apron with a bullrope and holds it with his partner. Train is whipped into the ropes and he awkwardly runs through a clothesline attempt. Tex gets knocked down and this is mercifully over after one more sloppy move.
WINNER: Ice Train in 3:27 with a powerslam
-The heels gets pounded after the bell for good measure and the crowd is somehow receptive to that LVP performance
FINAL WORD: Who is helping Eric Bischoff book this shit with utterly unprepared guys?
-Halloween Havoc is taking place one week before actual Halloween. Jesse claims they’ve never spent Halloween together when they hung out last year. That may have been JR, I don’t know anymore. This show is hurting my brain. The Horsemen are tag champs now and Jesse claims it’s tainted because Brian Pillman was replaced by Steven Regal at the time. Then, he gets mad because Tony turned away from him.
-The Nasty Boys walk out with Missy Hyatt. Jesse recognizes her chest and there’s a sign that asks if “she bought those.” I hate her, but she puts up with a lot. The music has issues and somebody has a sign as if they already knew that Missy would be with the heels. More terrible double entendre about Missy by Jesse right as I took him off my LVP list. The slow, bad song for the Horsemen plays and Paul Roma gets way too much pyro. It’s not enough for Arn Anderson. Michael Buffer handles the intros again. This seems so beneath him and cheap. You haven’t lived until you’ve heard Buffer introduce the Nasty Boys, though. I feel that way less so as he claims Roma is “quickly becoming one of the biggest and most popular stars.”
MATCH NUMBER FIVE: WCW TAG TITLE MATCH- The Nasty Boys w/Missy Hyatt vs The Horsemen (Champions)
-Jesse stares at Missy as she stares at the front row while Knobbs yells at Roma to start.
-A lot of crowd work before Roma finally attacks. Jesse is really reinforcing his LVP status with CONSTANT references to Missy being “natural.”
-Not much heat on a double powerslam by Paul and a whiffed dropkick. A fan threw money at Hyatt and it gets a close up on the arena floor. I’m not in a good mood.
-Arn vs Sags now and the focus is on the legs as Arn slams Jerry’s into the post. A “break his legs” chant starts. Jeez, this crowd is crazy. Now, there’s a “take it off” chant towards Missy. I really feel for her now.
-The next chant is “fat boys.” Maybe lunch should be cancelled due to lack of hustle (one more Heavyweights reference to go).
-I’m recapping what the crowd is doing because the match is nothing but the faces grinding down the challengers with leg locks. The match is so boring, the camera shows a Beavis and Butthead sign for no reason. A “Roma” chant starts and he looks like he doesn’t know what to do.
-Roma gets caught in the corner and the Boys finally go on offense. He doesn’t want to take Sags’ gutwrench, but it gets done.
-Long camel clutches while a “Porky Pig” chant starts. Man, 1993 was a different time.
-Roma botches a counter out of the hold, so the Nasties just tag out and keep it on him. He tries again and succeeds on Knobbs.
-Mild tag to Double A and Missy takes forever to set up a distraction for Sags to get his knees up and Knobbs to get a clothesline over the top. Jesse wants a female ref and we have a long way to go for that one.
-Sags nails Arn in the back with a STIFF chair shot on the floor. A fan even tries to help by grabbing the chair. Boy, this is a mess.
-Long abdominal stretches by both Boys. Arn reverses, but gets grounded again. Jesse mentions the hushed crowd. The ref misses the tag and more double teaming follows.
-Sags hits a suplex as Missy annoyingly jaws at the camera. She’s a natural heel presence, that’s for sure.
-Arn finaly hits a double faceplant and tags Roma in. He takes both on with clotheslines and a dropkick. He just doesn’t have it. He does have nice height on his missile dropkick.
-The Nasties go for the top rope bulldog, but Arn slowly makes the save and Sags awkwardly lands on them. The Horsemen hit the spinebuster and swan dive combo, but the ref misses Sags’ attack. Good continuity in making the bulldog a decoy.
WINNERS: The Nasty Boys in 23:57 to win the titles when Knobbs pins Paul Roma after a top rope elbow drop by Sags
FINAL WORD: Nobody wants a 24-minute Nasty Boys match. That includes the Nasty Boys themselves.
-The new champs celebrate and get interviewed by Jesse after the replay. Missy says she told Ric Flair she’d get him back. Is that for the SuperBrawl snub? She’s not a promo, that’s for sure. Knobbs and Sags don’t say anything groundbreaking to wrap it up.
-Clips of Cactus Jack getting destroyed by Vader to a Chris Cruise voiceover. Jack wins the first match by countout, but takes the powerbomb on the floor in the rematch. Jesus, that bump. A mysterious bag comes up before Catherine White is in Cleveland looking for Jack. Oh boy, they didn’t TOTALLY ignore this nonsense. Cactus has amnesia and he’s homeless and has a friend named Swampie. His wife and kid are brought to him to no avail. Harley Race has the bag now, but gets a cactus in a box as a warning. Jack finally returns at the most recent Clash of the Champions to attack Vader. Yoshi Kwan has been employed to protect the bag. Jack cuts a promo in front of a Smashing Pumpkins “Siamese Dream” poster wall. Corgan was probably creaming in his britches. He explains that the whole amnesia/wife thing was a ruse? That’s one way to get out of it. Being crazy is not a ruse and this is the first really good Mick Foley promo on PPV. He’s not another Vader conquest and says it’s a good thing you can’t arrest a man for the thoughts in his mind. It’s an MVP promo. The camera goes out of focus before the promo ends with a BANG BANG.
-Offensive oriental music for the OFFENSIVE AS FUCK Yoshi Kwan. This former New Breed white boy is really hamming it up with his facial expressions. He couldn’t make it any other way, so this is what he tried. Race accompanies him as a Mean Gene sign is pointed out. Mr. Bang Bang plays for the big in-ring return of Cactus Jack. His leg is all taped up and he’s very over in this first match since April. This is apparently a “Bounty” match. Jack goes right after Race at the bell.
MATCH NUMBER SIX: BOUNTY MATCH- Yoshi Kwan w/Harley Race vs Cactus Jack
-Cactus hits his patented clothesline over the top and Kwan dangerously falls to the floor. He responds with a messy jump kick. He’s on my LVP radar already.
-Enzuigiri on the ramp as Tony explains that the bounty doesn’t mean Jack gets the bag back with a win. So, what does it mean?!?!
-Abysmal karate thrusts and leg kicks before some bows and another bad spin kick. How many nobody characters does this show need?
-A leg kick is caught and Kwan is choked. A back rake and atomic drop make him sell in an overly stereotypically Asian way. He doesn’t bump well or seem to know what’s going on.
-Miscommunication from the heels thankfully gets this over with.
WINNER: Cactus Jack in 3:38 with a double arm DDT
-Jack suplexes Race after the bell and gets his bag back. It will never be mentioned again. Just do the match with Harley! Jack calls Vader out in the camera. The replay shows that Yoshi had no idea how to take Jack’s DDT. What a shitty, sole PPV performance.
FINAL WORD: I won’t count previous clips for my running tally of the dumbest thing Mick Foley has ever done, so I’ll have to consider agreeing to wrestle Yoshi Kwan as this show’s answer.
-The commentators recap the title changes and Schiavone says hi to a fan that interrupted him. Rick Rude is shown forcibly kissing Fifi on A Flair for the Gold. He’s dressed in full Zubaz and gets slapped. Rude jumps Flair with the Big Gold Belt and drops him with a Rude Awakening on the set. He’s wearing a fanny pack, too. What a look.
-Simply Ravishing and Rude walks down the aisle with a robe that appears to be too big. His white boots are a nice touch, though. He doesn’t cut his usual promo as Ric Flair enters with Fifi by his side. It’s a nice story that they wind up getting married decades later. Michael Buffer gets paid extra for unleashing “LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!” He puts over this being Rude’s first world title show. It’s notable that the title isn’t called the NWA Title anymore, just the “World Title” Flair has a few words, but Rude gets the mic first. He has an airbrushed towel with a picture of a bloody Flair before unveiling his pink tights with Fifi’s face right on the crotch. Awesome.
MATCH NUMBER SEVEN: WORLD TITLE MATCH- Rick Rude vs Ric Flair w/Fifi (Champion)
-Long close up of Fifi in the midst of chain wrestling and headlocks. Jesse talks about domesticated women and Tony tells him to shut up. This show is officially where he jumps the shark.
-An early Figure Four to a big pop, but Rude gets to the ropes quickly.
-Fifi is on the runway now while a wristlock is applied. Jesse says women should be barefoot and pregnant and his mic is cut off by a tech named Sara Lee. You can’t make this shit up. He’s now shouting and sounds even worse before finally getting put back on.
-The arm of Rude is worked for eternity before a little comeback. Flair chops him to retain the momentum. Rude screams “no” in an arm hold. He should try “nein” because it’s German for “no”. The Heavyweights challenge is complete!
-Barry Bloom’s name is dropped as we’ve hit 10 minutes and this armbar is still on. Rick finally punches out and it leads to a cross body over the top by Flair in a nice-looking spill. Ric takes a clothesline on the floor.
-Rude suplexes his opponent back in and locks in his patented Camel Clutch chinlock to kill time. At least he gets in character work by blowing Fifi kisses.
-The Nature Boy battles back briefly before Rude sloppily press slams him with a Stun Gun.
-Flair corner flop to the outside. Even at a boring concert, KISS is going to play “Rock N Roll All Nite”, you know?
-Bearhug time. That always helps.
-The bearhug is on the mat now and they are just having a conversation planning the rest of the match out. Flair tries to cover Rude’s mouth, but still nods in agreement to whatever is said. Good grief.
-Flair flop to laughs from the crowd. The Ravishing One hits a top rope strike before yelling at Fifi twice. He gets caught on the third attempt and takes a belly-to-back. Tony says “what a match!” Remove the exclamation mark, but add a question mark after the word “what.”
-Butterfly suplex for two. I think this is the first time I’ve heard a crowd “WOOO” on chops.
-Rude gets his knees up in the corner and hits a DDT. The camera catches a lot of empty cheap seats.
-Ric bites the fingers to avoid the Rude Awakening and hits his own for a great two count that the crowd believed.
-Flair hits a second rope leg snap. That’s a nice addition to the arsenal that I don’t think we’ll ever see again. He asks Nick Patrick for the time and gets a low blow behind his back. An inside cradle off a Figure Four reversal gets two only.
-A brawl on the floor leads to Flair going off the top rope from the ring to the floor and it’s a SUCCESS! That’s a first for him! Just act like Macho Man every time. Rude struggles to the apron.
-Ric flies off the top rope again and succeeds, but gets caught in mid-air with a clothesline. All time, he is 14 for 30. A top rope knee by Rude gets a good two count.
-Hip swivel to Fifi leads to a slap, then a forced kiss. He picks her up into the ring. Flair defends her with a backdrop, atomic drop and flapjack. The Figure Four is hooked on. While the ref decides to talk to Fifi for some goddamned reason, Rude goes to his trunks.
WINNER: Rick Rude in 30:48 to win the title with a brass knuckles punch
-The crowd is indifferent as Rude finally wins the big one that isn’t even that big anymore. The replay shows the knucks shot again and Jesse really is the GOAT of replay calling as he highlights all of the title changes for the evening.
FINAL WORD: Another overly long bout that was very boring. Somehow, it’s the second-best match on the night.
-The commentators talk Halloween Havoc again as War Games is previewed. Dustin Rhodes is coming into the match injured like Brian Pillman in 1991. GMC is handling the intros and not MICHAEL FUCKING BUFFER FOR THE MAIN EVENT. It’s probably too many rules for him to read. He has a word limit or some shit. The match is broken down too much as usual. The cage hasn’t even lowered yet. There’s finally some pyro and it comes down with a big BOOM once it’s finished. The commentators are legit shook and coughing from it. WCW: scaring their employees forever! That might be the highlight of the show so far.
-HARLEM HEAT BABY! Look at crazy young Booker T and Stevie Ray talking about chicken. Sid follows, then Vader without the fucking world title again. Did he lose it or something? Thankfully, Col. Parker is not their manager and there are no chains as the early posters seemed to indicate. Their names of Kane and Kole aren’t good, though. Road Warrior Animal leads the babyfaces to the ring. Why is Hawk on the poster if Animal is here?!?! There’s too much to focus on here. The Shockmaster is here and he’s already wearing construction shit! Sting and Davey Boy Smith seems non-plussed to be here. Animal is the captain…that’s not working the match. Dustin is all taped up and working because his grandmother is in attendance. He wants to go first and gets told no. It appears as though Shockmaster is going to start, but the Natural sneaks in and jumps Vader. Literally the 1991 story all over again.
MATCH NUMBER EIGHT: WAR GAMES- Harlem Heat, Sid Vicious and Big Van Vader w/Col. Robert Parker and Harley Race vs Sting, Davey Boy Smith, Dustin Rhodes and the Shockmaster w/Road Warrior Animal
-Dustin punches Vader down to the mat and the reaction isn’t what you’d expect because the crowd has had to sit through this show. He takes his boot off and clobbers his opponent in the head with it a few times.
-The camera work is terrible as you keep missing strikes and kicks. Sting tries to get the crowd behind Rhodes before a Vader Bomb cuts him down. The mask comes off as the face eats more shots.
-Dustin is fighting his ass off. He hits a DDT and sells like crazy. This is another MVP chance for him albeit this match not being up to the War Games name so far.
-The heels win the coin toss (of course) as Dustin catches Vader in a powerslam off the second rope. Stevie Ray…I mean KANE…enters for the 2 on 1.
-Boot shots to Dustin’s head are messy and so is a whip into the bottom part of the cage. There are so many bad wrestlers on this show. Stevie Ray is one of them.
-Of course Dustin is bleeding. Booker T claims he quit. Sting is in next and the heels meet him at the door. A double clothesline downs them as the Stinger has no chemistry with KANE.
-The timer is surprisingly on point as Dustin’s face is GROSS and Vader takes a couple shots into the cage.
-Vicious is in next. Hopefully, he won’t kill someone like last time. He chokeslams Sting and kicks Dustin. So far, so good.
-More bad camera work. It’s too close and scrunched up. Like…this isn’t the first time you’ve done this!!!!
-Sting is banged into the top of the cage by a heel press. Sid whiffs several kicks on Rhodes in the corner BADLY.
-Davey Boy is in next. Sid greets him and eats a clothesline. Vader takes another powerslam off the second rope.
-The Superpowers press Sid into the top of the cage as Vader is called the best big man ever on commentary.
-The heels are thrown into the cage a bunch as KOLE enters. Jesse says he’s unsure if Shockmaster will enter the match and Tony says he may fall on his way in. Oh man, what a turn of events.
-Book screams a lot on offense, but impresses with a diving clothesline over both rings. He hits his partner instead.
-The Shockmaster enters and makes it through all three ropes to Schiavone’s surprise. He slowly throws opponents into the cage and hits some ugly clubs to Vader.
-That cowboy boot might be the MVP because it’s still being uses on Sid by Dustin. KOLE is locked in a bearhug by Shockmaster. KANE looks on and doesn’t help. Sid does the same. Everyone is just waiting to clock out. After several seconds, they get their wish.
WINNERS: Sting’s Team in 16:42 when The Shockmaster makes Kole submit with a bearhug
FINAL WORD: This blood feud ends with the Shockmaster squeezing a new tag wrestler. Fuck that. This is NOT a top tier War Games match.
-Vader yells in the cage and wants the faces to return. Kole screams into the camera that he didn’t give up. Dustin is a mess. Sid raises his team’s hands as Book yells into the camera some more. Tony sounds relieved that it’s over.
-The commentators recap it all as the crowd is almost all gone already. Sid randomly thrusts at someone on the way out and calls the faces “goofs” in a tirade. Halloween Havoc will bring “Spin the Wheel, Make the Deal” back with Cactus Jack versus Vader. Jesse is rightfully excited as Tony signs off with pyro over the cage one last time.
THE LAST IMAGE: A wide shot of the arena
THE WRAP UP
FINAL MVP of PPV: Dustin Rhodes bled and a few others were fine, but nobody TRIED harder than Ricky Steamboat. You’d expect nothing less.
FINAL LVP of PPV: Speaking of trying, some many people tried to win this award. Apologies to the seven other men who almost took this home, but it’s all Yoshi Kwan. You can’t be an offensive sterotype AND suck at wrestling at the same time.
MY FAVORITE MATCH: Lord Steven Regal vs Ricky Steamboat
MY LEAST FAVORITE MATCH: Ice Train vs Shanghai Pierce
FINAL THOUGHTS: The Great American Bash 1991 might have to step aside because this show BLEW ASS. There is a plethora of bad, new acts with equally bad people behind them. The crowd was generally disinterested except for when they wanted to be distracting. The performers also seemed to be disinterested and there doesn’t seem to be any sense of urgency to fix any of the things that are wrong. This was an absolute disaster. MULLET DOESN’T RECOMMEND
NEXT TIME: We’ve reached our fourth recap! Who will be the big winners and losers in the next Flairiod? Find out next week!