Episode 40 - November 14, 1993: Stars and Gripes Forever

After Randy Savage flew into a rage last episode, WWF President Jack Tunney has decided that he’s too volatile to allow at ringside, leaving Vince to deal with Bobby Heenan all by himself. I like that they’re committing to this storyline, but I hope it’s because they’re going to bring Savage back into the ring and not a weird way of just firing him without saying that they’re firing him. I’d love to see him take on Crush at Survivor Series or something and just whoop some sense into him. Not sure if we’ll ever get a satisfying payoff or not, but there’s hope.

Crush wore his best singlet for school picture day.

Crush wore his best singlet for school picture day.

Our first match of the night is Razor Ramon VS the Brooklyn Brawler. It’s interesting that they keep putting Razor Ramon in matches because we never see the Heavyweight Champ defend his title. I’m honestly not even 100% sure that it’s still Yokozuna. Not that I would want to see any more Yokozuna matches, it’s just the principle of the thing. While Razor Ramon is roughing up the Brooklyn Brawler, Vince lets us know that Jack Tunney has lifted the suspension from Shawn Michaels and he’ll be reinstated. Ol’ Jack Tunney’s been pretty busy this week.

Now we’ll take a break from the action for our final Survivor Series update because it’s taking place the weekend after this show. With Tatanka out of the picture, the All Americans needed a fourth member. I figured that we’d just find out who they chose when they came out to the ring, but apparently they decided to reveal the mystery man at WWF Superstars a couple days prior to this episode of Raw. I have to admit, when I saw who it was, I lost my mind. Of all the lame pro-America wrestlers they could have went with, they went the total opposite direction and got the freakin’ UNDERTAKER! This has got to be the greatest move they could possibly have made. And just to be a team player, Taker’s made a slight modification to the lining of his coat.

Trench coat designed by Betsy Ross.

Trench coat designed by Betsy Ross.

Speaking of the All Americans, the next match is the one we voted for between Lex Luger and Pierre the Quebecer. The match goes on for a while with both men looking pretty strong. However, Pierre takes advantage of Johnny Polo’s cheating to get an edge early on. Lex Luger decides that turnabout is fair play and ends the match with his metal-plated forearm directly to Pierre’s face. The Quebecer goes down hard and Lex gets the win. The crowd explodes and the ref raises Lex’s hand in victory. Wait a minute. Wasn’t Lex a villain for using that forearm back when he was known as The Narcissist? They even started making him wear padding on it so he couldn’t use it against anyone. So what gives? Now that he’s America’s champion, he just gets a free pass to cheat and hurt people? We’re cheering this now? What a perfect encapsulation of American nationalism.

Lex's audition for American Gladiators is going very well though.

Lex's audition for American Gladiators is going very well though.

Oh and did you think that was the end? Nope, they manage to sneak in one more Jeff Jarrett promo. I hope he never wrestles and just keeps cutting promos. We’ll see if his streak continues next week.